实习医生格蕾第一季

一开始看觉得很精彩，从第二季开始，一个个一开始很喜欢的角色纷纷义不容辞的变成贱人……弄的我无比郁闷～主角就是经典的小三，和那医生的感情纠葛让人烦不胜烦…第三季开始Izzie就迫不及待的变成一个无比沉闷的精神病人，之后更是拉着George跳到贱人最前线，变成整套剧集里最让人恶心的一对…………当然也有喜欢的。

Cristina的性格是我所欣赏的，还有Miranda Bailey医生，整套剧的大爱啊。

看到她终于当上总住院医生的时候真是让人高兴……

爱情是美妙的危险，声张强势的人总是倾向拒绝爱情的表露和爱意的轻易表达，使自己慢慢沉积得冷血，因为无欲（爱）则刚，害怕盲目的爱会使自己变得软弱，削弱生命的自我完善的价值，阻碍对成功的偏执追求。

强者是绝世而独立的忍者，独享隐忍的残酷，也是举世皆浊而独清的可怜虫，霞披凤冠却无人来爱，《实习医生格蕾》里野心勃勃的女外科医生cristine形容自己的两性关系为 Win or Lose，所以仅仅是向伴侣表达内心感受也要死撑到最后一刻，为了成为心胸科外科医生的翘楚人物而甘愿放弃为人妻去相夫教子的机会，这是强迫症的极端例子 抗拒欲望是件很困难的事情，比如美食对于我，也比如美女对于《实习医生格蕾》里的Mr.steamy(惹火)先生,冒天下之大不韪跟最好朋友的妻子上床,原因是不可自拔地爱上了她,但是同时暗度陈仓，和所在医院数量可观的稍有姿色的护士有染，这是不愿也不能抵抗和放弃身体欲望的极端例子 天生的自卑是不会随着社会地位的提升而消失的，比如对于《实习医生格蕾》里的Izzie，女医生里鹤立鸡群的一个，魔鬼身材，天使脸蛋，又有邻家女孩的热心肠，事实上她出生贫寒，少女时期早孕，成为一个自愿放弃抚养权的单身妈妈，但是通过自身的不断奋斗（美国梦的代表哈），成为西雅图大医院的小医生，心底却暗自菲薄医术不如cristine, 家庭出身不如meredith, 甚至认为前两者在刻意排斥她，无头苍蝇般恋上医院里的人人喊打的贫嘴帅（衰）哥Karev，有妇之夫兼蓝颜知己o’mally, 甚至奄奄一息的心脏病人danniel，她的选择总是让人跌破眼镜，拥有天妒的美貌与智慧，碰到的人却总不对，骨子里的自卑如影随形，挥之不去。

我真真欣赏她的是其不娇柔做作的风格，白手起家，独立奋斗，不被物质同化（比如她把800万dollar支票贴在冰箱上，最后募捐给慈善诊所） 幸福是什么，成功？

金钱？

名望？

比如《实习医生格蕾》里meredith的母亲Ellis，强悍女权，是医学界里举重若轻的世出人物，自私冷酷，却也无形中背离了幸福的根本，叱嚓风云医学界一生却在晚年戏剧性的患上老年痴呆症，沦落到要在养老院孤独终老，如果不是心脏病突发死亡的话。

她对期待Meredith是继承她的衣钵，成为一位“extraordinary”的杰出的女性，当她知道meredite仅仅是优秀，而不是杰出时，失望透顶，大声严斥meredith在浪费生命。

她甚至干预Meredith和俊美的脑外科医生derek的恋情，假想爱情会妨碍基因优秀的女儿成为杰出女性（要是cristine 是她女儿就好了）。

系出名门所背负的心理重压是俺们草根们轻易体会不到的，Meredith 拥有良好的家庭出身，优异的禀赋，甜蜜的爱情，蒸蒸日上的事业，只是无论如何努力都无法满足母亲的“欲壑难填”的期许，战战兢兢的活在母亲生前和死后的阴影下（带着母亲的骨灰去上班），小时候父母婚变，父亲的突然离去也导致她对爱情的信念产生怀疑，所以她的身体不断游离和流浪在一夜情上，直到精神肉体遇到了derek的抚慰，种种现世经历轻易把她推上了放弃生命的决断，幸福对于她不过是梦幻，紧握在手，却从不曾拥有。

作为肥皂剧，剧中人物确实有极端主义和夸张的成分，除了片中血淋淋的真刀实枪的各类复杂外科手术让像我这样的医盲大开眼界，难能可贵的是精彩纷呈的剧集的嬉笑怒骂中对人性的显微见著的入木描画--在喧嚣中寂寥，在盛宴里落寞，欢乐里的哀恸，高潮后的空虚，痛苦后的涅磐，那是人人心底深藏的秘密花园。

第一次对黑人开始有感觉。

看到他做手术时带的花头巾，很可爱。

喜欢christina没有表情的脸。

反正看这两个人最有感觉后来开始喜欢Callie和ADDISON。

后来每个人都变成很爱。

我第一次看到格蕾的时候还是大学二年级，因为当时新东方英文老师推荐这部片子，谁知一看就爱上了，不可自拔。

开始时候没日没夜得看了两季，后来忙着作业考试毕业就忘了，毕业来到温哥华之后日子过得没滋没味，又想起来看这部剧。

像小孩子攒糖吃那样，故意忍住好奇心，等新出了几集之后找个日子一气儿看完，然后再满怀期待下一次的到来。

昨天看土豆上有23、24的资源了，因为今天要考试，所以拼命忍住不看。

下午考完，从West Broadway一路晃晃悠悠往天车站走，竟然看到有一家专门卖医生和护士服装鞋子的店，玻璃上贴的海报就是亲爱的格雷。

门口的橱窗摆着看起来很舒服的白色鞋子，我也好想要一双迫不及待跑回家，开电脑，上土豆。

一开始是坐在凳子上看的，可是到那个男人开枪后，我就吓得抱着笔记本跑到床上，盖着被子，缩成一团揪心的看。

我还嘲笑自己说，傻瓜，他们是在演戏啊，可是还是攥紧双拳咬紧牙关屏住眼泪，他们陪了我那么久那么久，整整4年的时光啊，感觉就像成了彼此相熟的朋友，一举一动总牵心。

在看24集的时候，外面的天也一点点的黑下来，当结尾曲响起，没有来得及开灯的房间像是熄了灯的电影院，原来自己看电影也有这么曲终人散的感慨。

第七季的预告也没有让我感觉好一些。

躺在床上，以前格蕾里的一幕幕缓缓飘过，我想念那个漂亮的模特想念她明媚的笑，想念那个蓝色小鹿眼睛的男人，想念那个永远握着别人心的男人，想念他在婚礼上说给新娘的话。

但是最最想念的是BAILY打电话给她儿子时望着西雅图的夜色哼的那首歌：“爸爸的东西好，妈妈的东西妙，上帝总会给每个孩子，属于他自己的宝。

”没有人陪伴的日子里，我也常常这么唱给自己听。

格蕾每集的最后总会出现几句比较深刻的话，关于生活的，关于爱情的，关于幸福的，关于生命的，我总会从中得到点什么。

大学一开始看的时候，我最不喜欢的是chistina，觉得她自私又无情，可是看到后来，我最喜欢的角色却变成了她，她外表冷漠嘴上刻薄聪明又处处争先，她就像是住我每日微笑面具下的另一个我，不服输的我，苛求完美的我。

想着想着，就忍不住找出第一季来看，刚看了开头，眼泪就落下来了，故事是从五个朝气蓬勃的实习医生开始的，请注意，朝气蓬勃这个形容词，年轻多美好啊，为了一点感情彼此纠葛不清，为了争一个特殊的病人勾心斗角。

那时候他们面容姣好，周身洋溢着青春的幸福。

等看到第六季，MERE皱眉时候额心的那道纹让我觉得刺痛，我最近总盯着镜子看，发现我也有了这么不深不浅的一道，我以前在家的时候不该埋怨爸爸妈妈总是皱眉弄得眉心的皱纹怎么揉都揉不开。

现在我知道，这就是时间，摧枯拉朽的力量，岁月是一把太锋利的手术刀了，没有谁能在它下全身而退。

想起前几天老师讲她年轻时的故事，说她在30多岁的时候终于又遇见了她高中时期暗恋了很久很久的男生，但她怎么都不敢相信坐在她隔桌那个不修边幅言语粗鄙满脸酒气的男人，是那个高中时候清秀的抱着吉他唱歌的打篮球超好的拉风男孩。

就像是谁来跟大家开了场玩笑。

或许真的上帝在云端，只眨了一眨眼。

等多年以后的我，回国再见到你们的时候，是什么场景，我会不会变成一个一点都不漂亮不可爱也不幽默的平凡妇人了呢？

24岁，本命年，开始觉得明天的我永远不可能比今天更年轻，我开始恐慌了，不知道该怎么办，像我小时候觉得20岁多老啊，老得都可以去死了，可是转眼我都要奔三了。

另外一个让我难过的理由是，小时候我以为20岁的我就很了不起无所不能了。

可是事实上，快25的我，还抱着台破电脑靠在床上打字，一事无成。

如果可以，真的想在老去之前死去，就让生命永远停在最灿烂的时候。

我害怕未来。

世事那么无常，有谁知道明天会怎样。

要是格蕾里的年轻人们知道今天会面临死亡，5年前的今天他们还会不会走进这家医院呢？

可是生命里总有些人注定要相逢，有些又注定要离开。

前天无意逛到老公前女友的博客，发现她贴出了结婚照和婚礼时候的照片，还说年底就会有宝宝了，洋溢着幸福。

我从来没见过她，但是心里一直都感谢她。

都说每一个女人，都是男人的一所学校。

（可惜我不是一所好学校，我只会给人带来伤害。

）她教会了他怎么对女生耐心体贴，教会了他什么叫责任感，所以等我再遇见他的时候，他已经不是那个羞涩的不成熟的小男生，而是变成了一座高大的山，一个坚实的臂膀，一个宁静的港湾。

所以，是她错过了他，他才又遇见了我。

这样看来，似乎又要感谢时光，把他雕琢成优秀的老公，然后送到我的身旁。

可是我又会被岁月千刀万剐成什么样呢可不可以慢点再慢点儿，轻点再轻点儿。。。。。。

SEASON ONEEpisode 1: “A Hard Day’s Night” O.A.O.T.S., "Dance"Thirteen Senses, "Into the Fire"Butterfly Boucher, "Life Is Short"Rilo Kiley, "Portions for Foxes"Vaughan Penn, "Ready to Rise"BANG sugar BANG, "Super Cool?Jem, "They"Episode 2: “The First Cut is the Deepest” The Cardigans, "Live and Learn"The Ditty Bops, "Sister Kate"Keane, "Somewhere Only We Know"Get Set Go, "Wait"Tegan and Sara, "You Wouldn't Like Me"Episode 3: “Winning a Battle, Losing the War” Lisa Loeb, "Fools Like Me"Tegan and Sara, "I Won't Be Left"The Ditty Bops, "There's a Girl"The Ditty Bops, "Wishful Thinking"Reindeer Section, "You Are My Joy"Episode 4: “No Man’s Land”Get Set Go, "Break Your Heart"The Eames Era, "Could Be Anything"Rosie Thomas, "Let Myself Fall"Sia, "Sunday"Vaughan Penn, "Truth"Tegan and Sara, "Where Does the Good Go?"Episode 5: “Shake Your Groove Thing” Ivy, "Edge of the Ocean"Interpol, "Evil"Dee, "Money Girl"Buffseeds, "Sparkle Me"Psapp, "Tiger, My Friend"The Ditty Bops, "Wake Up"Episode 6: “If Tomorrow Never Comes” Psapp, "Chapter"Butterfly Boucher, "Never Leave Your Heart Alone"Jem, "Save Me"The Ditty Bops, "Walk or Ride"Episode 7: “The Self-Destruct Button” Tegan and Sara, "Downtown"Wilco, "Hummingbird"Joe Purdy, "Suitcase"ACDC, "The Self-Destruct Button"Jem, "Wish I"Episode 8: “Save Me” Nellie McKay, "David"Masha Qrella, "Feels Like"Tegan and Sara, "Fix You Up"Joe Purdy, "I Love the Rain the Most"78 Saab, "No Illusions"Laura Veirs, "Rapture"Episode 9: “Who’s Zoomin’ Who?” A.M. Sixty, "Big As the Sky"Psapp, "Cosy In the Rocket"Medeski, Martin & Wood, "End of the World Party"Iron & Wine, "Naked As We Came"Maria Taylor, "Song Beneath the Song"Nellie McKay, "The Dog Song"The Radio, "Whatever Gets You Through Today"SEASON TWOEpisode 1: “Raindrops Keep Fallin’ On My Head” Firstcom, "All I Need"Michelle Branch, "Breathe"Esthero & Sean Lennon, "Everyday Is a Holiday (With You)"Ivy, "Feel So Free"Bow Wow Wow, "I Want Candy"Mike Doughty, "Looking At the World from the Bottom of a Well"Kate Earl, "Some one to Love"Blue-Eyed Son, "Step Away From the Cliff"Joe Purdy, "The City"Episode 2: “Enough is Enough (No More Tears)” Goldfrapp, "Beautiful"Joy Zipper, "Go Tell The World"Jem, "Just a Ride"kt tunstall, "Suddenly I See"Brandi Carlile, "What Can I Say"Episode 3: “Make Me Lose Control” Sylvie Lewis, "By Heart"Inara George, "Fools In Love"Elevator Action, "I'm a Bitch"Roisin Murphy, "Ruby Blue"Get Set Go, "Sleep"Maria Taylor, "Song Beneath the Song"Episode 4: “Deny, Deny, Deny” Ben Lee, "Catch My Disease"The Delgados, "I Fought the Angels"Merrick, "Infinity"Rolsin Murphy, "Ramalama"Episode 5: “Bring the Pain” Way Out West, "Don't Forget Me"Mike Doughty, "I Hear the Bells"Tegan and Sara, "Not Tonight"Roisin Murphy, "Prelude to Love In the Making"Blue-Eyed Son, "Step Away from the Cliff"Blue-Eyed Son, "When I Come Home"Cowboy Racer, "Yellow Horse"Episode 6: “Into You Like a Train” The Hereafter, "Back Where I Was"B.C. Camplight, "Blood and Peanut Butter"Umbrellas, "The City Lights"Emiliana Torrini, "Today Has Been Okay"Episode 7: “Something to Talk About” The Faders, "Better Off Dead"Annie, "Chewing Gum"Mark Joseph, "Get Through"kt tunstall, "other side of the world"Rosie Thomas, "Since You've Been Around"Episode 8: “Let it Be” Gabin, "Bang Bang to the Rock n' Roll"Joe Purdy, "Far Away Blues"Nouvelle Vague, "I Melt With You"Anya Marina, "Miss Halfway"The Faders, "No Sleep Tonight"The Chalets, "Sexy Mistake"Episode 9: “Thanks for the Memories” The O.A.O.T.'s, "Dance"Dressy Bessy, "New Song (From Me to You)"Keren Ann, "Not Going Anywhere"Fannypack, "Nu Nu (Yeah Yeah)"Josh Rouse, "Sad Eyes"Emiliana Torrini, "Serenade"Nellie McKay, "The Dog Song"Mark McAdam, "Too Hard"Episode 10: “Much Too Much”Get Set Go, "Crying Shame"James Blunt, "High"Greenskeepers, "Lotion"Roisin Murphy, "Night of the Dancing Flame"Lifehouse, "You and Me"Episode 11: “Owner of a Lonely Heart” Jim Noir, "I Me You"Emiliana Torrini, "Sunny Road"James Blunt, "Tears and Rain"Gemma Hayes, "Two Step"Moonbabies, "War On Sound"Episode 12: “Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer” Jet, "Back Door Santa"Maria Taylor, "Christmas After All"Holidays on Ice, "Here Comes Your Ride"Sixpence None The Richer, "It Came Upon a Midnight Clear"The LeeVees, "Latke Clan"Catie Curtis, "Lo, How A Rose E'er Blooming"Lou Rawls, "Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town"Nat King Cole, "The Christmas Song (Merry Christmas to You)"Mascott & Dave Derby, "This Christmastime"Episode 13: “Begin the Begin” Slow Runner, "Break Your Momma's Back"The 88, "Hide Another Mistake"Kraak & Smaak, "One of These Days"Cary Brothers, "Ride"Episode 14: “Tell Me Sweet Little Lies” Saint Etienne, "A Good Thing"Carey Ott, "Am I Just One"Adrienne Pierce, "Fool's Gold"Sam Winch, "I Got Some Moves"Metric, "Monster Hospital"Mike Tarantino, "Wienermobile Girl"Episode 15: “Break On Through” Emilia, "Big Big World"Leeroy Stagger, "Just In Case"Landon Pigg, "Sailed On"Kendall Payne, "Scratch"Rebecca Lynn, "Small World, Big Girl"Kate Earl, "Someone to Love"Aqueduct, "The Suggestion Box"Vassy, "Wanna Fly"Episode 16: “It’s the End of the World…”Big Big World (TNT Big Phat Mix): EmiliaMonotypes, "Dead Streets"Michael Stipe & Chris Martin, "In The Sun"Joseph Arthur, "In the Sun"Ursula 1000, "Kaboom"kt tunstall, "Miniature Disasters"Kate Havnevik, "Unlike Me"Episode 17: “... As We Know It” Greenskeepers, "Back In The Wild"Anna Nalick, "Breathe (2 a.m.)"Foy Vance, "Homebird"Correatown, "I Tell Myself"Ambulance LTD, "Stay Where You Are"Kate Havnevik, "Unlike Me"The Weepies, "World Spins Madly On"Episode 18: “Yesterday” All Sad Girls Are Beautiful, "Baby Blue"Joshua Radin, "Closer"Psapp, "Cosy In the Rocket"Diplo, Pantera Os Danadinhos, Sandra Melody & Vybz Cartel, "Diplo Rhythm"Headlights Headlights, "Everybody Needs a Fence to Lean On"Rosie Thomas, "It Don't Matter to the Sun"Devics, "Just One Breath"Corinne Bailey-Rae, "Like a Star"Shout Out Louds, "Wish I Was Dead Pt. 2"Episode 19: “What Have I Done to Deserve This?” Boy Least Likely To, "Be Gentle With Me"Madeline Peyroux, "Careless Love"Get Set Go, "I Hate Everyone"Devics, "Just One Breath"Corinne Bailey Rae, "Like A Star"Sandra Melody, "Newsflash"New Moscow, "Slow Down"Brandi Carlile, "Throw It All Away"Emiliana Torrini, "Today Has Been Okay"Episode 20: “Band Aid Covers the Bullet Hole”Ning Baizura, "Breathe Again"Sing-Sing, "Come, Sing Me a Song"Jem, "Flying High"The Last Town Chorus, "Modern Love"Tina Dico, "One"Urbs, "So Weit"Episode 21: “Superstition” Anna Nalick, "Catalyst"Luke Doucet, "Free"Foy Vance, "Gabriel and the Vagabond"Dr, Moses McNeil and Company, "Halleluah"Rufus Wainwright, "Hallelujah"Jeff Buckley, "Hallelujah"The Fray, "How to Save a Life"Devics, "Just One Breath"Jamie Lidell, "Multiply"Postal Service, "Such Great Heights"Greenskeepers, "You Don't Know Me"Episode 22: “Name of the Game”Sunshine, "C'Mon Yeah"Gnarls Barkley, "Crazy"Dressy Bessy, "Girl, You Shout!"Butterfly Boucher, "Life Is Short"Joshua Radin, "The Fear You Won't Fall"Anna Nalick, "Wreck of the Day"Phil War, "You Think I'm Crazy"Special: “Under Pressure”Breath, "Breaking Down"Mark Joseph, "Fly"Adrienne Pierce, "Fool's Gold"Merrick, "Infinity"Bright Eyes, "I Woke Up With This Song In My Head This Morning"The Weepies, "World Spins Madly On"Kendall Payne, "Scratch"Episode 23: "Blues For Sister Someone"Metric, "Police and the Private"Hotel Lights, "Follow Through"Sunshine, "Love"James Morrison, "Better Man"Caleb Kane, "Go Mad"The Chalets, "Gogo Don't Go"The Chalets, "Red High Heels"The Chalets, "Fight Your Kids"Episode 24: "Damage Case" Foy Vance, "Homebird"Kate Havnevik, "Nowhere Warm"Regina Spektor, "On The Radio"Brandi Carlile, "Tragedy"The Legends, "Something Good"Inara George, "Oh My Love"Kate Havnevik, "Unlike Me"Anna Nalick, "Breathe (2 a.m.)"Natalie Wilson, "When You Need a Friend"The HorrorPops, "Where They Wander"Episode 25: "17 Seconds" Yeah Yeah Yeahs, "Gold Lion"Snow Patrol, "Somewhere A Clock Is Ticking"Episode 26: "Deterioration of the Fight or Flight Response"KT Tunstall, "Universe And U"The Coral Sea, "Look At Her Face"Au Revoir Simone, "Through The Backyards"Gomez, "How We Operate"Episode 27: "Losing My Religion"Peter Droge, "Under The Waves"Dressy Bessy, "Side 2"Amos Lee, "Colors"Masha Qrella, "Destination Vertical"Kate Havnevik, "Grace"Snow Patrol, "Chasing Cars"SEASON THREE Episode 1: "Time Has Come Today"The Dixie Chicks, "Lullaby"Tegan & Sara, "Take Me Anywhere"Sleeping At Last, "Quicksand"Emiliana Torrini, "Nothing Brings Me Down"Gnarls Barkley, "Gone Daddy Done"Grant Lee Phillips, "Under The Milky Way"Episode 2: "I Am a Tree"Moloko, "The Time Is Now"Mat Kearney, "Crashing Down"The Chalets, "Theme From Chalets"Bittersweet, "The Mating Game"Jesus Jackson, "Running On Sunshine"Snow Patrol, "Open Your Eyes"Mat Kearney, "All I Need"Episode 3: "Sometimes a Fantasy"Outkast, "Idlewild Blues"Lilly Allen, "Take What You Take"The Pipettes, "Dirty Mind"The Bamboos, "Step It Up"The Poems, "Ballad of a Bitter End"Joe Purdy, "Can't Get It Right Today"Episode 4: "What I Am"Camera Obscura, "If Looks Could Kill"The Gossip, "Standing In The Way Of Control"Au Revoire Simone, "Back In Time"Kate Havnevik, "So - Lo"TV On The Radi, "Province"Mindy Smith, "Fall For Nothing"Episode 5: "Oh, The Guilt"Nellie McKay, "Clonie"Kate Havnevik, "Kaleidoscope"The Second Band, "Wild Is The Wind"Fionn Regan, "Be Good Or Be Gone"Keisha White, "Don't Mistake Me"Episode 6, "Let The Angels Commit"Teddy Bears, "Cobrastyle"Jim Noir, "My Patch"Peter Bjorn & John, "Young Folks"Gomez, "Notice"Vega 4, "Life is Beautiful"Episode 7: "Where The Boys Are"Beck, "Think I'm In Love"Jim Noir, "Tell Me What To Do"Luke Temple, "Make Right With You"Inara George, "Greedy"The Jealous Girlfriends, "Something In The Water"Big Sandy & His Fly Rite Boys, "It's Time"Brett Dennen, "There Is So Much More"Bedouin Soundclash, "12:59 Lullaby"Bill Ricchini, "A Cold Wind Will Blow Through Your Door"Episode 8: "Staring at the Sun"Lily Allen, "Not Big"Get Set Go, "Everybody Get Movin'"The Watson Twins, "Time of My Life"Mat Kearney, "Where We Gonna Go From Here"Ingrid Michaelson, "Breakable"Chandra Wilson (Miranda Bailey), "God Bless the Child"Episode 9: "From a Whisper to a Scream"The Dears, "You And I Are A Gang of Losers"Damien Rice, "9 Crimes"Kate Havnevik, "New Day"Episode 10: "Don't Stand So Close to Me"Anya Marina, "Sociopath"John Legend, "Show Me"Son Volt, "World Waits For You"Episode 11: "Six Days (Part I)"The Research, "Lonely Hearts Still Beat The Same"William Fitzsimmons, "Passion Play"Emiliana Torrini, "Beggars Prayer (demo)"Michelle Featherstone, "Rest Of My Life"Travis, "Love Will Come Through"Episode 12: "Six Days (Part II)"1. OK Go, "Here It Goes Again"The song plays as Meredith and Derek bicker in bed after not getting much sleep. Izzie and George discuss Izzie's check.2. Regina Spektor, "Fidelity"The song plays as Addison and Callie talk about Addison's choice to not have Mark's baby.3. Ingrid Michaelson, "The Way That I Am"The song plays as Cristina complains about sleeping alone, and Meredith confesses she feels jealous of George's relationship with his dad. Cristina brings Burke his dinner.4. Susanna & The Magical Orchestra, "Love Will Tear Us Apart"The song plays as the O'Malley family makes a decision about George's dad.5. Gary Jules, "Falling Awake"The song plays as Burke, Cristina and Derek talk about Mr. o'Malley. His family is gathered around him in the hospital. George's friends wait in support of him.6. The Slip, "Life in Disguise"The song plays as Cristina consoles George, Alex and Addison spend time together, and Derek goes to sleep beside Meredith.Episode 13: “Great Expectations”1. Lily Frost, “Enchantment”Burke has Derek and Meredith over for a dinner party at his house, and Cristina sits in the kitchen counter tossing cereal into her mouth and drinking wine straight from the bottle.2. Umbrellas, “Ships”Callie, Cristina and Richard operate on a patient. Derek yells at Meredith about telling Sloan about the chief. Dr. Bailey asks Dr. Burke for help. Izzie talks to Rachel about letting go of Jilly who is going to die of a disease.3. Skye, “Love Show”Addison invites Alex to a surgery. Meredith and Derek fight, but make up. Cristina and Burke make up. George and Callie make up.Episode 14: "Wishin' and Hopin'"1. Sybarite, "Runaway" feat. PsappThe song plays as Izzie and Bailey look onto their new "Denny Duquette Memorial" clinic. Cristina considers her ring. Meredith prepares to speak with her mother.2. Beck, "Elevator Music"The song plays as Izzie and Alex offer a patient a free consultation. Ellis and Cristina talk about Meredith.3. Miho Hatori, "Barracuda"The song plays as Vincent learns about his girlfriend. Cristina begs to be included in a surgery. Meredith warns Derek about her mother but Derek talks to Ellis anyway.4. Iain Archer, "Canal Song"The song plays as Meredith talks with Richard.5. Susanna & The Magical Orchestra, "Believer"The song plays as Richard and Ellis talk about Meredith and their past relationship.6. The Whitest Boy Alive, "Fireworks"The song plays as Cristina and Burke share their moment.Episode 15: "Walk On Water"1. Radio Citizen, "The Hop"Meredith sits in the bathtub alone, Derek tells Meredith he is concerned about her, Izzie misses George, Cristina tells Burke not to tell anyone they are engaged.2. Union of Knives, "Opposite Direction"Bailey tells interns to get out there and help people, Meredith tends to the wounded.3. 8MM, "Liar"Izzie tells Vince to find search and rescue, Derek asks Meredith if she is upset, Addison and Richard talk, Cristina confronts Burke.4. Snow Patrol, "Make This Go On Forever"Alex checks on Jane Doe, Mrs. Heit waits for word on her son, Rick starts to have a seizure, A crowd of distraught family members yells at Alex, and Meredith is accidentally knocked off the pier into the water.Episode 16: "Drowning On Dry Land"1. Butterfly Boucher, "A Bitter Song"The song plays as the episode opens and Meredith struggles in the water. Later, the track plays at the end of the episode as the doctors furiously work on Meredith.2. Kate Havnevik, "Timeless"Song plays as Izzie drills into the patient's head. The little girl stares at the water as Derek finally emerges with Meredith.3. Patrick Watson, "The Great Escape"The song plays as Izzie is in surgery with her patient. Alex posts pictures from the morgue.Episode 17: "Some Kind of Miracle"1. Aqualung, "The Lake"The song plays early in the episode as the Chief works on Meredith.2. Damien Rice, "Sleep Don't Weep"This track is showcased when Meredith's heart flatlines, and the doctors look on, perplexed - and unsure if they should continue.3. Unkle Bob, "Swans"Song plays as Chief says goodbye to Ellis, Derek sleeps by Meredith, and Izzie & Denny sense each other in the hallway.Episode 18: "Scars and Souvenirs"1. Koop, "Come To Me"Plays as Izzie gets surprised by Alex in the morning, and she complains to Meredith about it. At the same time, George complains to his wife, Callie, about Izzie.2. Gomez, "Girlshapedlovedrug"Cristina catches up with Colin, who shows up out of the blue. Derek and George prep for her operation. Callie tells George about her family.3. Psapp, "Hi"This one plays while Meredith tells Derek she is having dinner with her father, Thatcher, and the interns talk in the cafeteria.4. Wild Sweet Orange, "Land Of No Return"Meredith and her father and stepmother have dinner. Meanwhile, Dr. Burke questions Cristina about her past relationships.5. Anya Marina, "Move You"George and Izzie get drunk and have a blast together. Alex checks on Jane Doe, again. Cristina and Meredith have a heart to heart.Episode 19: "My Favorite Mistake"1. Mirah, "La Familia"This song plays at the beginning of the episode as Izzie wakes up and Meredith and Cristina ask her questions about her night.2. Alamo Race Track, "Black Cat John Brown"At lunch, Izzie asks Meredith about blacking out after drinking. Cristina talks about Burke. Izzie asks about Jane Doe's face selection.3. Adam Merrin, "Still Alright"You hear this song as George has a flashback to the night before... and he goes to confront Izzie about it.4. Let's Go Sailing, "All I Want From You Is Love"This song plays as Meredith harvests bone during her much-anticipated operation, and Cristina amputates her patient's foot.5. Let's Go Sailing, "Sideways"Alex talks to Jane Doe about her new face. Cristina talks to Burke about their wedding. Meredith talks to Derek about her dad.Episode 20: "Time After Time" 1. Amy Winehouse, "You Know I'm No Good"The song plays as Burke and Cristina operate on a patient.2. The Whitest Boy Alive, "Burning"Plays as Cristina and Meredith discuss their issues with Colin and Susan, and Alex asks for Cristina's help.3. Nouvelle Vague, "Dancing With Myself"Playing in the background as the interns hang out at the clinic and talk about their patients.4. Maria Taylor, "Clean Getaway"George helps Izzie get dressed and she tells him about her family.5. Lullaby Baxter, "Fontana Fontaine"This track plays when Derek asks Bailey for advice about Meredith, and as George takes a recovering Izzie down to pediatrics.6. Maria Taylor, "A Good Start"Jane Doe argues with Alex. Burke and Cristina talk about Colin at home. Susan confronts Meredith and they have a heart to heart. Addison finds Richard hitting on a woman... and decides to intervene.Episode 21: "Desire"1. The Reddmen, "The Secrets of Amanda Prine"We hear this song as the interns study for a big exam.2. Let's Go Sailing, "Better Off"Callie and Addison talk about their various relationships and feelings while this song plays (and Ava listens) in the background.3. The Bird & The Bee, "Again & Again"The interns continue studying, while testing out wedding cakes.4. Beck, "Nausea"The surgeons and interns participate in various operations.5. Anna Waronker, "How Am I Doing"This song plays at the end of the episode, as Cristina is studying and picks a cake, while George and Izzie talk about the future, and Addison unsuccessfully tries to get Alex to hang out with her.Episodes 22 & 23: "The Other Side of This Life (Parts I & II)"1. Feist, "Sealion"The song plays as the interns are wakeful at night, and Cristina awakes to find Burke's mother is there.2. The Mary Onettes, "Lost"The song plays as Addison Montgomery drives along the Pacific coast and enters the Oceanside Wellness Clinic.3. The Broken West, "Down In The Valley"Addison enters the Wellness Clinic and finds Naomi.4. The Switches, "Message From Yuz"Naomi tells Addison they have an opening.5. The Rosewood Thieves, "Los Angeles"Couples therapy at the Wellness Center.6. Jem, "California Sun"Naomi and Addison talk, Violet runs into her ex.7. The Adored, "Not Having It"Cooper cries over his stripped vehicle.8. Brandi Carlile, "Turpentine"Addison yells at the elevator to stop talking!Episode 24: "Testing 1-2-3"1. Let's Go Sailing, "This Rope Is Long"This song plays as Meredith gets dressed in a black dress as the interns study. Callie and George study. Meredith talks with Derek at the hospital and Cristina and Burke talk about the wedding.2. Amy Winehouse, "Wake Up Alone"The song plays as George tries to talk to the Chief, and the doctors operate on the three hypothermic mountain climbers.3. Ingrid Michaelson, "Corner Of Your Heart"Alex and Ava argue about her memory and what she really knows. Izzie tries to talk with George about Mercy West but becomes upset.4. The Weather Machines, "Stains Of Saints"This song plays as Addison joins Derek, Mark and Preston at Burke's bachelor party at Joe's bar.5. Paolo Nutini, "Million Faces"A mysterious woman offers to buy Derek a drink in the bar, while Ava (or Rebecca Pope) and Alex reconcile, and Richard finds Adele.Episode 25: "Didn't We Almost Have It All"1. The Jealous Girlfriends, "Roboxula"Callie copies Cristina's vows onto her hand, Izzie and Meredith play toilet paper bride, Richard tells Mark he won't be Chief, and Bailey tells Derek that they found the fourth mountain climber.2. Grace Potter, "Falling Or Flying"Cristina is unable to sleep on the eve of her wedding day, Alex watches Rebecca and her husband talk, Derek talks to Meredith about his night.3. Ray Lamontagne, "Hold You In My Arms"Burke practices his vows in the O.R., Callie says she wants a baby, Alex talks with Rebecca's husband, Jeff, while he holds her baby.4. Coburn, "Closer"Cristina operates in order to clear her head before the ceremony. Izzie helps George tie his tie and declares her feelings for him.5. Ray Lamontagne, "Within You"The interns get their test results. Ava begs Alex to give her a reason to stay, and Meredith and Derek have a disappointing heart to heart.6. The Hereafter, "Eulogy"The song plays as Alex talks to Addison about Ava. George and Bailey talk about his results, and whether they failed one another. Meanwhile, the ladies get ready for the wedding.7. The Mary Onettes, "Explosions"Cristina readies herself and Preston goes to check on her.8. Ingrid Michaelson, "Keep Breathing"The song plays in the final few minutes of the episode as Alex looks for Rebecca, Meredith helps Cristina out of her dress, Callie watches Izzie sitting in the chapel, George meets Lexie Grey, and Richard talks with Derek about the Chief position.P.S.在雨天，在晚上，反反复复听着曾经在剧集里出现的那些歌。

随着歌的旋律模模糊糊记得起那些情节，那些漂浮不定的情绪。

因为这部剧，记得Jem，记得Thirteen Senses，记得Snow Patrol，记得Keane，当然也会记得Meredith、Dereck、Cristina、Izzie这些人物。

他们的哭与笑，快乐与悲伤，都在这些那些歌中。

　　我从来不是幽默的女生　　不喜欢突然的一场雨　　明知道你正伤心　　却又默默离去　　明知道下雨天的你　　需要亲密的语气　　说今天就快过去　　雨会停　心将平静　　我从来不是幽默的女生　　只好为你淋雨　　我从来不是幽默的女生　　不适合这种情景　　我从来不是幽默的女生　　真不幸　坏了天气　　　　　　　　　　　——陈珊妮《我从来不是幽默的女生》寒假前因为好友Dean的推荐而开始看《Grey's Anatomy》，不紧不慢地看了一个寒假，倒也就这样追到了第三季。

可以说，在昨天之前——或者更确切点，在我和Pheobe聊完天后看了第三季第13集以前——《GA》里我最喜欢的女孩虽然不能确定是谁，但一定不会是Christina Yang。

曾经带着几分偏见地认为：怎么可能会有人喜欢上Christina Yang这样的女孩呢？

她不美丽、不温柔、固执、冷漠、而且还有着带几分功利的进取心。

看着她每天一大早来到医院只为抢到好的病人，看着她想尽一切方法就为能上手术台，看着她不修边幅一心工作，觉得这个女孩除了优秀，似乎再也找不到一点讨人喜欢的地方了。

甚至，就连她与主治医生Burke的相恋，也让我觉得这只是她想要获得手术机会的一个手段而已。

到了第二季，一位身体中有炸弹的病人使整个医院都陷入了恐慌，Geroge和Izzie转移到了医院的另外一栋楼，而Christina和Grey却都留在病人所在的楼层。

当时，Geroge和Izzie坐在墙角谈论着正陷入危险的那两位朋友，Izzie评论她们说：“因为她们都是行动派，而我们却大多时候在旁观。

”Christina的勇气让我对她有了改观。

无论她留下的原因究竟是担心Burke，还是仅仅想要获得一个难得的手术机会，但她的确是一个毫无疑问的行动派。

当医院出现身体释放不明毒气的女病人时，Sloan医生拒绝进入手术室处理病人，而Christina却立刻举起手对主任说：“我可以在游泳池不呼吸游三个来回。

”于是渐渐觉得，这样一个有着几分傻气的行动派，似乎也不至于那么让人厌恶吧。

直到Burke意外中弹，Christina却退缩时，我才终于发现，这个女孩并不像自己表现的那样坚强。

原来，这个优秀得近乎冷酷的女孩，也终究会有软弱的一面。

而这样的软弱，竟让我对她有了莫名的好感。

Christina的确不是一个善于讨人喜欢的女孩，她与Burke斗气时小孩子般互不相让，她对Burke的母亲骄傲地报出自己的学历，她为了好的手术机会不顾一切……那样一个优秀且骄傲的女孩，却也会逃跑般离开Burke的手术台，也会在听到Burke说“marry me”时忍不住激动流泪。

觉得这样的她，才是在那个躲在为了保护自己而假装坚强冷漠的外壳里的那个真实可爱的Christina Yang。

记得在女性文学课上，老师曾经谈到过文学作品中的女性形象：在大多数文学作品中，女性形象被简单地分成了两类——美丽温柔的天使形象与丑陋邪恶的恶魔形象。

在这种分类的无形影响下，女孩们从小就被教导着要做天使。

她们会收到芭比娃娃、毛绒熊之类的礼物，然后每天自言自语般地在教导自己娃娃的同时也教导自己，说：要乖、要微笑、要顺从……在我还足够年轻、可以拿年龄作为炫耀的资本的时候，很喜欢《小王子》中的小狐狸，并因为小王子最终的选择而感到伤心。

可之后才渐渐明白，其实小玫瑰这样的女孩注定了比较容易得到幸福。

作者总是很喜欢通过文学作品来说话，而《小王子》的结局，是否可以理解为圣艾修伯里想要对女孩们说：聪明的女孩只适合做知己，而能陪伴一生的女孩不用太有思想，能够笑容甜美、用细软的声音说话就好。

也许正是这样，他才会选择文章中小玫瑰的原型——那个因为《小王子》没有献给自己而任性出走的康素罗。

那么多的故事，那么多的王子最后爱上的都是公主，而那么多的公主无一不是温柔美丽的。

也许，温柔美丽就足够了吧，麻烦到隔着十多层羽绒垫也容不下床上的一颗豌豆也完全没有关系，傻到除了等待王子的吻来拯救自己外什么都不会做也根本不是问题——温柔、美丽，这就是与王子过上幸福生活的资格。

印象中唯一一个能称得上拥有智慧的公主图兰朵，也只是被人们定义成为了一个因为有着阴暗的童年从而仇恨男人、报复社会的心理畸形的小姑娘而已。

更不厚道的是，作者还要落井下石地给她安排了一个悲惨的结局，似乎是在坏笑着告诉那些蠢蠢欲动的女孩们，除了温良恭俭让之外，其他一切的优秀形容词都是为男人造的，想要把它们放在女人身上是要不得的。

难怪伍尔夫会感叹：“有谁能计算得出，一个诗人的灵魂被禁锢在女人的身体里时，会有多大的悲愤。

”可是，现实中的女孩实在无法被如此简单而不负责任地分成天使和恶魔两大阵营。

就像Chritina Yang这样的女孩，虽然算不上恶魔，但也实在做不了天使。

即使明知道小玫瑰比较容易得到幸福，但毕竟不是每个女孩都做得了小玫瑰。

有些女孩，她们不知道怎么给人安慰，学不会如何讨人欢心，不甘心做别人光芒背后面容模糊的小女人，更演不来那些山盟海誓、缠绵悱恻的爱情肥皂剧……于是，有时候也会忍不住想，这些偏执倔强的女生们，还真是挺让人扫兴的吧。

好在看到Christina Yang的身边有了愿意将心放在她手上的Preston Burke，不然这些女孩，是不是该手拉手站出来向这个世界鞠躬道歉，说：“真不幸，坏了天气。

”

追了两年的《Grey`s anatomy》，关于一群外科实习医生的工作以及爱情的故事。

国内外的医疗环境虽然不一样，但从他们身上，总会不多不少的找得到我当外科实习生的影子，有些事情也深有感触。

听说《Grey` anatomy》还刚获得了2007艾美奖的最佳剧情奖，真是可喜可贺。

在《Grey`s anatomy》的第三季，16集中，一如既往扮演一个悲情角色的Grey Meredith被她悉心救护的病人跘倒掉进水里，扮演受惊吓后对周围事物全无反应的无名氏小女孩，在她掉下水后，仿佛对世界绝了缘，她恰如其分的出色演出，让大家为Meredith的生死捏了一把汗。

但故事发展下去，其实明眼人都会猜得到，Meredith是无论如何都不会与我们告别的，在最紧急的当头，还是王子会挺身而出去拯救公主。

当Shepherd把Meredith从水中打捞起来时，面色苍白的Meredith让扰攘的世间刹那停顿下来，在死亡的面前，一切都显得如此脆弱。

然而在17集中，用了整部的时间去交待Meredith的死而复生，有点冗长，但并不显得拖沓。

更难得的是，除剧情安排得合情理之外，众人合力的表演亦有意料之外的惊喜。

面对自己最爱的人，一向自信的Shepherd亦变得手足无措，只能呆坐一旁抱头默哀。

但当中表演出彩的不是的刻薄的Bailey，不是坚韧的Webber，不是冷静的Burke，不是表现各异的Izzie，Geroge，或Karev，而是一向冷酷自负的Yang，他在大家已进行了四轮CPR，正准备放弃的时候，用她那古怪的语调，并带着扭曲的表情向诸位上级医师喊出“Try again”，不得不老实说，在这一刻，我真的是被感动了。

随之而来的结局其实也一早知道，难逃出主角不能死这个俗套，然而，编剧围绕这个结局，真的在很多小细节上花了心思，令人不得不为其细腻的思路击节叫好。

当一切停下来之后，暗自想了想，如果换成是我，在生与死的边缘，是否会有人为我喊出这一句“Try again”。

一她长的算不上多么漂亮，只比克里斯丁娜·杨好看一些，没有伊兹·斯蒂文那么性感。

但是，她有一双象是永远沉浸在梦中的，水光荡漾的眼睛。

她有一个笑容，常常被雾笼罩的，有点无奈的，明知道蠢却也非得这么做请你原谅的笑容。

她是梅莉迪斯·格蕾，西雅图恩典医院外科女实习医生，她爱上了已婚的主治医生德瑞克·德瑞克，注定要经历悲惨的感情生活。

有朋友说剧集很好看，但是讨厌这对男女主角，按他的话说就是没一个爽快人。

德瑞克爱格蕾，当出轨的妻子把一纸离婚书给他，他却退缩了，选择了家庭却又不肯放弃格蕾。

我不讨厌他，因为生活中确实有这样的男人，在感情和内心的道德律中间摇摆不定，哪个也不想舍弃，却给所有相关的人包括他自己带来痛苦。

他的痛苦是真实的，他的感情也是真实的。

只是他在生活中无法象在手术台上那般决断。

而格蕾只是爱着，她的理智不想这样，但感情占了上风，无法控制，无可救药。

所以每次在医院，病房里，走廊上，看见德瑞克，她立刻迷失，束手无策，就象飞蛾，怎么样也抑制不了向火苗扑去的渴望。

那是与生具来的本能，我理解。

莉香对完治也是这么说的，爱上了一个人，有什么办法呢？

二伊兹也是这样。

伊兹·斯蒂文，从小在拖车屋长大的女孩，靠给《男人帮》拍内衣插页赚够了读医学院的学费。

她以为自己可以成为一个好外科医生的，但是她爱上了自己的病人，一个心脏功能衰竭却有着温暖笑容的男人，丹尼。

因此别的都不重要了。

为给爱人抢到一颗移植的心脏，她亲手割断了丹尼维持生命的管子，触犯了作为一个医生的所有禁忌，甚至法律，还把4个好友卷了进来。

当丹尼醒来的那一刻，你看她脸上的光，那是透过最黑最重的云层一角射下的太阳的光辉。

那时侯我知道，丹尼活不了了。

编剧不会让他活着。

偷来的心脏不可能属于他。

但我还是喜欢伊兹喜悦的神情，打心眼里向外发散的幸福，尽管那么短暂。

“……我觉得我的动作慢下来了。

我的动作很慢，而我周遭的一切事物却是那么快，我想回到过去，回到正常的样子，而不是现在这个可怜的伊兹，穿着礼服躺在洗手间的地板上，跟他死去的未婚夫在一起，但是我回不去了……怎么会发生这种事？

怎么会这样结束？

为什么我是孤独一人？

”三爱情不过是《实习医生格蕾》的一部分。

5个实习医生，更多的要面对生死，面对抉择，为一个生命作决定。

剧集里许多病例故事单拿出来都可以拍成一部优秀的电影。

一场火车车祸，一根钢管穿透了一对陌生男女，两个只能活一个，要放弃那个伤更重但是痛时也能说笑话的女孩吗？

一对老人，妻子只有6个月的生命，妻子瞒着丈夫，丈夫瞒着妻子，因为他们约定，要去威尼斯，在夕阳西下时候坐平底船穿过叹息桥，传说这样就会永远在一起。

一个女人晚期肺癌，她说，“我一辈子没抽过烟，没吸过大麻，从不喝酒，今天之前，10年没吃过甜点，在别人眼里，是健康的化身，可我却得了肺癌，很荒谬是吗？

我一辈子都压抑，抑制每个冲动，遵守规则，现在我不要这么做了。

我要找回我的生活。

”她拒绝了手术，出院了——“至少在我这么做的时候，我知道自己曾经活过。

”生老病死，人生里所有的线索最后在这里交织，展现出真实与残酷的一面，阴影中又有勇气和美好。

四心是我们活着的标志。

一颗健康的心就象战鼓，把携带养分的血液及时泵到全身，是维持我们生命的动力系统。

人心千姿百态，梅雷迪斯·格雷痴情的心，克里斯丁娜·杨捉摸不定的心，伊兹·斯蒂文狂热的心，乔治·梅利淳朴的心，亚里克斯·卡莱脆弱的心。

最完美的心是住院医生米兰达.贝莉的，坦率近乎透明，真实如刀锋入骨，被唤作纳粹，却在严厉中让你体会真正的善良。

人心是脆弱的。

冠心病，先心病，风心病，心肌病……心会累，会疲倦，也想休息，逃避，时不时的怠工。

有人想换掉，有人甘愿坚守。

所以西雅图恩典医院最好的心胸外科医生伯克总是很忙，忙着用手术刀划开胸腔，把一颗心拿出来，捧在手里，切切剪剪，缝缝补补。

那些受伤的心，有些死了，有些开始新生。

我最喜欢的斯丁的歌是关于心的，《Shape of My Heart》——我知道黑桃代表卫兵的剑，我知道梅花是战争的枪，我知道钻石象征着财富，但是那并非我心的形状， That′s not the shape, the shape of my heart ……亦舒小说里常提到洛史超域的一首歌，也是与心有关。

《玫瑰的故事》中——气渐渐有点凉意,我驾车上班,扭开无线电听,红灯的时候头枕在驾驶盘上,无线电上在播放洛史超域的歌——“我不想说及/你如何碎了我的心/如果我再逗留一刻/你是否聆听我的心/噢,心/我的心/我的老心”。

《丁香》中——她身边放看一架小小无线电，正在播放洛史超域那永远不灭的歌：“如果我独自站着，影子是否会掩藏我心的颜色，蓝色是眼泪，黑色是天空运行的星，对你来说， 不会比一面镜子更有意义……”我一向最爱洛史超域的慢歌，充满感情的声音诉说一些微不足道的琐事，但这琐事却是爱情呢……亦舒有个短篇就叫《破碎的心》——　我立刻注意到她脖子上挂的一条项链，红色珊瑚的小珠子，串住一颗金色的心型坠子，本来很普通，但是那枚心在左上方却是有裂痕的，细细的痕中嵌镶着碎粒的蓝宝石，像是心碎了，又复元了，但永远留下难忘的瘀痕。

开头是破碎的心，结尾也是——我是一个成年人，以后的生活，再凄苦再空虚，我还是得若无其事地活下去。

但是我的心已碎。

可儿在我的生命中出现、消失，如一颗流星，闪亮后的黑暗，我也会学习习惯。

但要忘记她，却也不是这么容易的一件事呢，每次看到穿白衣的女孩子，我的心使隐隐作痛。

我开始爱上洛史超域的一首歌：——“我的心，我的老心，如果我再逗留一刻，你是否会聆听我的心？

”看来，在我们一生中，心都是要破碎的，有的碎的多一点，有的少一点，有的很快就修补上了，有的留下疤痕，有的留下裂缝，也有的干枯至死。

只是，你的心，是否曾有人聆听？

Alex: [one on one meeting with the Chief] I went to college on a wrestling scholarship. I played baseball, some basketball. But we'll go with football. Chief: What the hell does football have to do with who cut the LVAD wires? Alex: Let's say you were drafted to a team that wasn’t your first pick. You know, you don't like the players. You hate the way they play the game. You even think the quarterback is full of crap. The quarterback's a pain in the ass you don't owe a damned thing to. But, it's your team. You don't quit. You don't talk to the press. You don't bitch to the coach. You just, you just go out there every Sunday and you make the blocks and you take the hits and you, you play to win. You show up and you suit up and you play, because it's your freaking team. Chief: [one on one meeting with Cristina] I know your type. You're a surgical junkie. Cristina: Yes sir? Chief: I'm just saying, it's not going to be easy for you to be away from the OR that long. Cristina: No sir. Chief: And if you want to get back to the OR, you're going to tell me what I need to know, aren't you? Cristina: You're right, it's not easy for me to be away from the OR. And it's not easy for me to sit in front of you, or any other authority figure, for that matter, and not be able to give you the exact answer that you want to hear. I'm the one with the answers. I've always been the one with the answers. But right now, sir, I don't have any. Chief: Dr. Yang. Cristina: How do you keep your edge sir? Because I've watched you and you've been doing this a long time, and you're clean...you're focused, you are the job, nothing gets to you. And the thing is, sir, I was like that...until I got here, until I actually started doing this job and now everything is--is fuzzy and... Chief: That’s beside the point. Cristina: No, see, sir, this is the point. Because I can't tell you, I can't tell you what happened in that room. And before I could have; no guilt, no loyalties, no problem. Before--before I wouldn't have even been in that room. I wouldn't have gotten involved. I would have never frozen in surgery, and I would have told him what I thought he should do. I had an edge, sir. I had an edge, and I've lost it, and I need it. I need it back. So, if you could just tell me, how you keep yours and how not to be affected, I know I could be a great surgeon. So if you could just give me the answers, I would really appreciate it. Chief: You're excused Dr. Yang. Cristina: But-- Chief: You're excused. Cristina: I'll tell you, I'll tell you who cut the LVAD wires if you'll please-- Chief: No you won't, I don't want to know. Not from you. Yeah, I have the answers, but I can't tell them to you. I'm not going to be responsible for you becoming less human. Izzie: [one on one meeting with the Chief] I'm a pretty girl. Chief: What? Izzie: I'm not being arrogant, it’s just, it’s just kind of a fact. For a long time I made a career from my looks, so I get it, I'm a pretty girl. And not in a "from a certain angle" way, in an obvious way. It’s the blonde thing and the big boobs thing, big boobs are a key to obvious pretty if you know what I'm saying. Chief: Dr. Stevens. Izzie: It’s how men see me. I'm not a smart girl or an interesting girl, I'm a pretty girl. The blonde and the boobs it confuses guys into thinking that I'm someone else. And I'm used to it. And I'm used to them walking away when they realize… But then Denny goes and asks me to marry him. Chief: Is that why you cut the wires? Izzie: He doesn't make me feel like I'm a pretty girl. He makes me feel like… like me. I think he might know me. And so, if I did cut the LVAD wire, and I'm not saying that I did, but if I did, then no, I don't feel guilty. And I know that I should. And I would if it were anybody else. But I can't feel anything but happy. George: [one on one meeting with the Chief] Aren't you gonna say anything or [pause] I'm not gonna break [pause] I'm starting to get a little freaked out, but I'm not gonna break. It’s not because I don't care, because I do care what you think about me, I do. Care. I just can't tell you want you want to hear. Which seems to be a theme in my life right now. Just because you can't say something doesn't mean you don't want to, you can want to very much. You can be with a person and be happy with them and not love them. And you can love somebody and not want to be with them. You don't need to love someone to want them. Now that's frustrating, when what your brain tells you you want and what you actually want don't match up. It’s exhausting. And, well, it’s complicated. But that's life. And life... sucks. Chief: [one on one meeting with Meredith] [as Meredith is staring off] I've known you for a long time. And I know your mother and father. And I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that you did not cut those LVAD wires. Meredith, I need you to tell me who did it. Meredith: I've been going over this and over this in my mind trying to piece this together. It was you, you're the reason my parents broke up. And it wasn't just an affair, she really loved you. It wasn't just this cheap thing where she didn’t tell you she was married. It wasn't all a lie. She left her husband for you. But you stayed with your wife, because it was the right thing to do. Maybe safe, but she was the right person for you to be with. Let’s face it, my mother, nothing wrong with being safe, being with the good guy because he’s good and we are talking about forever here. You've never regretted your decision. You've never looked back... Right?

我怎么都忘不了grey对Derek郑重其事地这样说.直到现在,她的神情,口吻,声音,都不停回荡在我脑海里,像一部自动播放机,反复而强烈.有一点哀怨,多一点坚定,有一点撒娇,多一点坚持.坚持.是的.在这里我想说的是,对于每天第一个迎接我们在真实世界苏醒过来的太阳,对于偶尔一场来去无意地霜降,对于繁华世界瞬息万变的人们,对于纷繁复杂需要面对的现实,对于更多不由自主的选择与被选择...我们能不能也大声地,深情地说一句:choose me! pick me! love me! 呢?总有人在说,生活总是要继续的.诚然如此,但我们能不能不要半推半就的生活?我不想在经历了这样一些挫折之后跟自己说我是不行的,原来我这么糟糕.我不想在经历一些失去之后跟自己说这是注定的,不是你的就不是你的.我不想在每天醒来之后不知道自己今天应该做些什么,不知道哪些是我真的愿意去做的.我不想在每天睡觉之前对于明天是没有任何期待的,甚至都没有一件事能够让我醒来后从床上利索地下来开始行动的....我通通不想...因为我要好好生活.要让温暖的太阳选择我,要让美好的运气选择我,要让胜利的快乐选择我,要让相聚的幸福选择我,要让旅行的喜悦选择我...要让我的每一天都值得.去期待,去到达,去完成.假如我还有80年的生命..80年就是960月..就是29200天...接下来,我要好好爱我的每一个1/29200.我要对你说:I love you and i choose you.Please,pick me and love me.